Movie Review: Birdemic: Shock and Terror

This movie surprised me. If you've seen Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds you know the basic premise (and if you haven't seen The Birds, what the hell man? Go watch it.) But back to Birdemic. Written, directed, and produced by James Nguyen, the easiest way to describe this movie is as a film-school remake of The Birds hammered together with a romcom.

Production values on Birdemic are looooooooooooooooow. The acting is downright awful to the point that Kristen Stewart would seem oscar worthy by comparison. The cinematography is all but non-existent with the majority of outdoor shots being completely overxposed with all highlights being blown to smitherines. The audio is all over the place, from what I suspect was purely on-camera microphones the entire time. The editing is jumpy and hinders the flow of the movie quite a bit. And most importantly, the special effects. Oh god, the special effects. What comes to mind on the special effects is mid-nineties clip-art. The titular birds are literally copypasta, all performing the same stock motions on infinite loop. The fire that appears quite a bit is glorious in its three color, 8-bit style. The effects, despite their sillyness do compare well to those used on Hitckcock's film, as that film used a similar technique of overlaying the bird footage over the regular film. I'm not sure if this is actually an homage to Hitchcock, or just cheap production.

With a production budget of just $10,000 one must ask oneself, how the hell did they manage to spend $10,000 on this movie? My suspicions would suggest it was spent mostly on locations and fuel costs, but that's purely speculative on my part.

All this being said, I enjoyed the movie. Despite all its many many many flaws, it's very charming. Even with their wooden performances, the characters are compelling and relatable. If you've got 90 minutes to kill and are up for a bad movie, definitely check it out.

As always if you have a movie you want me to review, or are skeptical about watching something on Netflix, leave a comment and maybe I'll watch and review it for you.

Partial Movie Review: The Room

The Room, written, directed, produced, and starring Tommy Wiseau is an awful movie, and I could not finish it. I was recommended this movie by a friend for review, and I am now reconsidering our friendship. I made it 20 minutes into this movie. If you can finish it, I congratulate you. I regret taking the time to watch it. While there were two sex scenes in those twenty minutes, they were completely uninteresting to the point of boredom. With the obvious exceptions of the few tits, there was no hook to the movie. The characters were uninteresting, the acting was flat, and the camera work was like something from a daytime soap opera. Even reading the Wikipedia overview of this movie was a chore, with the plot being horribly inconsistent.

I would not recommend this movie to my friends. I would not recommend this movie to my enemies. I'm fairly certain showing it to prisoners would constitute a violation of the eighth amendment. If you're looking for a bad movie to watch, there are much better choices that are far more entertaining. If you're looking for tits, just go to a porn site. It'll be far more satisfying both in terms of sex and plot.

If you have a movie you want me to review, or one you're skeptical about watching, leave a comment and I may watch it and review it for you.

Movie Review: Rubber (2010)

I'm not really sure where to begin on this one. Written/directed by French musician/filmmaker Quentin Dupieux; it's a movie about a tire. A tire with psychic powers. That kills people. The movie is every bit as absurd as that description makes it sound. It really makes no sense. At all. I can't really say too much about the plot, just because the absurdity is all interconnected and anything beyond a simple description would lessen the impact of the story. The cinematography was good, not great. The music was decent, and the supporting cast held their own. The best part about the film, in my opinion, is that you actually get a feel for the tires personality, so props to them for that. If you scratch your head when confused, definitely avoid this movie, as you'll likely end up bald. If, however, your head remains unscratched, then by all means check it out on Netflix. If you have any movies you think I should review, leave a comment and I may review it.

The Beginning

Quick introduction. What is this? A blog for movie reviews. What kind of movie reviews? Simple ones. Quick overview of the plot, ye/nay on whether or not to see it. Thinking of watching a movie, but unsure whether to do so? Get a hold of me and I'll watch it and review it. Any further questions? Just ask.